Decoding our messages, are not always as easy as we would like them to be.

HawkIf a picture paints a thousand words…then why have I been having such a hard time finding the words to write? I am going to blame it on the eclipse.  

I have read that this solar eclipse was supposed to really flush to the surface all the things we have worked on that we have not completely worked through or just shoved under the proverbial rug…job well done…solar eclipse…job well done. 

I suppose this is what happens when time and time again we choose to ignore or temporarily placate those pesky issues.   I was directed to become quiet and call upon the Goddess Sige last Friday.  I did , and felt compelled to really rein in my outward reactions to things.  To not react but to contemplate and just be.  To not “do” anything. 

This is seeming to become a recurring practice for me.  The practice of  just “be”ing present.  It has become quite obvious to me that I have not yet mastered or learned what it is I am to learn from this state, since I feel I am destined to relive the lesson over and over again!

I like to think I pay attention to the symbolism in my life. I believe that I am able to connect with my guides and both hear and see the messages and signs that they lay out for me, and yet, I continue to cling to what is.  Something continues to hold me back. 

Most recently I have been on the cusp of making some life changing changes when suddenly I am halted.  By what? Why? Self doubt?   At a quick glance I would instantly say yes, I am just doubting myself, rip the bandage off already! I am quick to blame myself, always have been. Then, upon a closer look, I realize that maybe it is not me.  Maybe it’s Spirit, stopping me, letting me know that the time is not right.

This is where I get frustrated and down right confused at time.  For me personally, I find that justification and excuses can cloud my internal communication.  The pro’s and con’s don’t offer any light to my situation.  They come out equal.  Everything seems like I should just be jumping into the proverbial pool.  Dive in and go for it!  Yet, at the same time points to waiting. The more I push forward the more I feel something holding me back.  Cements my feet to where I stand.  Regardless of how I feel about the situation or issue, my feet stay planted. I look closer, is it that four letter word “fear”?  It could be.  It also seems to make sense (to wait).  Is fear that cunning that it can disguise itself as rational thought?  I believe it is, so that is why it is so confusing. 

Then…when I start to really pay attention to the symbolism that presents itself to me through nature, the signs start to back up the fear.  The picture starts to get clearer.  Not clear enough that I just “know” that would be too easy! Ha!  But clearer for me to remember that I need to trust what I feel. 

I am the type of person that sees the A and the Z in the alphabet.  I start at A and want to jump and run to Z.  What feels like slow motion to me is real-time for others.  I need to learn to trust the process, slow myself down to appreciate and understand the process.  I need to take my time.  Earn my way.  I will still be ready to pounce when the time is right.  In the mean time I need to learn to relax and go with the flow. 

This started to become clearer to me when I began deciphering the birds I have seen lately.  The Hawk, I am used to, I can relate to them. They have been a totem in my life for a while now.  Their symbolism makes sense to me and feels like home. The others I have had to really spend some time with. 

Below are some of the generic and basic information on the birds/raptors I have seen lately. There seems to be an interesting theme.  

Hawk Totem Meaning

  • The Hawk is the messenger of the spirit world
  • Power of focus
  • Know when to take the lead when the time is right
  • Power to see, clear vision
  • Strong connection with spirit, increased spiritual awareness

Eagle Totem Meaning

  • Courageous
  • Stretch your limits
  • Do not accept things as they are
  • Reach higher and become more than you believe you are capable of
  • Look at things from a new, higher perspective
  • Be patient with the present
  • You are about to take flight

Osprey – The Beacon Totem Meaning

  • The Beacon
  • Mental and emotional, being able to immerse yourself into emotions.
  • The Sun. Solar Worship.
  • Knowing when to strike.
  • Overcoming ‘Grass is Greener’ Syndrome.
  • Respecting Others.
  • Honing the Senses. Precise Timing. Streamlining.
  • Environmental Awareness. Comfort Zones.

Pelican Totem Meaning

  • Focus, Direction
  • Humility, Kind
  • Safety, Alert
  • Nurturing, Self – sacrificing
  • Wisdom, Knowledge
  • Camaraderie, Teamwork

The overall message is about being aware, patient, part of a group, know when to make your move.  Look at things from a higher perspective.  Clear vision, Clarity.

I need to pay attention and trust my inner barometer…(we all do) know that what I feel is valid and comes from spirit.  No need to rush in, learn to take my time and appreciate the slow and steady approach. 

My message to all of you is trust you are not alone.  Self doubt is the biggest threat out there to enlightenment. Trust the process and listen to your guides.  Ask for help and you will receive it.  The trick is slowing down long enough to decipher the message.

Namaste~