When you come into contact with people are you presenting your true self, or do you wear a mask?
March 1, 2013
I started thinking about this when I noticed that I have what seems to me as a slightly different presentation of myself, depending on the social situation I am in. So I started to take a look at what I am filtering and what masks I may where and why. This prompted me to list the most common social groups we encounter on a daily basis. Some of these groups overlap eachother and can make them even that much more complex.
What about you, what masks or filters do you wear when you are with specific groups of people? Do you represent yourself universally to all or does it depend on who you are with?
Take a moment and think about the following groups of people…
- Family (immediate)
I would love to say that I am always the same person. But I am not. I used to strive to be the same person all the time. The same face, same energy. However what I have come to realize is that I am missing the beauty of all that I am. We all wear so many faces throughout the day, it is the forgetting of our truth and our essence while switching from mask to mask that fades us away. The trick, or lesson really (no tricks) is to learn how to remain yourself but allow your energy to adapt to the different situations you find yourself in, to appropriately shine.
If you were asked which of the above do you feel you can be your true unmasked 100 watt self around, what would you answer? Would it be Family, Spouse, Friends? How many would pick Strangers? In giving you a 100% honest answer, for me I would pick Stangers.
Many may argue my point, and please feel free. I love to hear and learn other perspectives!
I would pick strangers because with them there are no preconcieved expectations. I can just be. Usually in those moments of just being, when we do not think about the how or the why we are able to just be.
When we are with all the other groups our Friends, Family, Spouse, CoWorkers and Relatives we are ourselves but with a filter or mask. We excentuate the traits that blend best with a specific group. This goes even further than the groups listed we have subgroups within subgroups. The challenge we all face is balance. Balancing the extent of the filters or masks we wear. If you find that you are using filter upon filter to drown out your truth then you are no longer being authentic. Many will say you should not have to filter or mask at all that you should be accepted for you in all your entirety. I think that there is sooo much truth to that, however I would challenge those with only that stance.
My challenge would be this. Think about the many multidimensional layers that make us who we are. In different times of our lives one may be more dominant than another (granted if you have successfully learned all that you were here to learn and were living in nirvana, well then this would not apply). For all the rest of us we have journeys to travel and lessons to learn. If we only surround ourselves with those that are just like us we become limited in our thoughts and our growth. By not allowing ourself to filter and not shield off others we are able to encounter new situations, new information and expand. Learning and growth is about expansion of both our views and our encounters. Let us also not forget the power of enlightenment of others. Allowing others to see our spark will draw them near and open there hearts and minds to possibilities they had not thought of before. We are all here to share our knowledge with each other to come back to the collective. Filters and Masks can help us connect more, it allows the different personalities that we all posses, the ability to unite and have a voice.
Some here may call me crazy, but I really do believe we all carry multiple personalities; some of course may have more varied personalities than others abd there is a fine line of control with these traits.
Think about it like this; if you are a parent you have a parent mask that you wear, at work you have (or for a lot of us) you have a professional mask you put on and filter out the party animal. With friends you allow the social side of your to become dominant and you allow the worry and stress to be filtered. With our spouse or a significant other you allow a romantic side to flow through and you enter a deeper more intimate you be exposed. Some here would say that the filters and masks go away. But this is where I disagree, almost all of them do but you still have expectations that are within the relationship, for the most part here, you have to wear the filter or mask however you may perceive it to remember that you must consider another, not just self. I am not saying we are not authentic or we are not really ourselves, I am saying that we all have layers and masks. I just wonder how aware are you of yours?
The next question past awareness of the filters and masks are how you are using yours. Are you hiding behind them seeking false acceptance? Are you afraid to take yours off for fear of rejection? Have you lost sight of who you really are?
This is where running your energy, and grounding yourself can help you get back to you. By learning how to tap into earth and spirit and then release…all that isn’t yours…This is how you can find your way back to you. Here you can also feel again how it feels to be just you. A you without expectations, without responsibility, without masks and most importantly without judgment. You are then able to look at where you wear your masks and filters. You will be able to discern what serves you and what doesn’t. The process of finding your energy and allowing yourself the space and boundaries to be all that you can be will be the most rewarding experience of your life. It is the foundation of all growth.
You will then understand the different filters and masks that you use and how to use them in a constructive way that allows you to still be who you are.
It all comes back to understanding ourselves, and to truly understand ourselves we have to understand our energetic field, bodies our quantum selves. We need to first look within to understand what is on the external side. Our internal light (spirit) shines so bright that sometimes we need to hold a space that allows our energy to not overpower anothers, this is where understanding your energy and holding your boundaries is so very crucial!
Going back to my intitial question of: If you were asked which of the above do you feel you can be your true unmasked 100 watt self around, what would you answer? My initial answer of Stranger is probably incorrect. Even when we are encountered by a stranger we are probably wearing the masks and filters of whatever situation we are in. We have a higher chance of being 100% us, especially since we could be in that relaxed transition state. My answer now though would be none of the above situations and would be, when I am running my energy.
Well, there is a quick look at masks and layers. Soon we will talk more about the positives as well as the negatives.
Have a wonderful day!